The Four Loko Experience

My first Four Loko experience...

I was at my friend Rachel's house in Virginia partying with her brother, Derek.

I'm going to marry Derek some day.

Four Loko face:

If you've ever finished a Four Loko, you'll appreciate the fact that once we finished ours, Derek and I challenged each other to a dance-off to end all dance-offs.

I had to wear Rachel and Derek's Mom's old high school majorette leotard...complete with a broken zipper and sequins.

Derek let me pick the music and put the strobe light on.

Ready?

Begin.

 We busted out our signature killer moves.

Derek killed me with his leap frog thrust to victory.

Next thing I remember, I woke up at 4am next to Rachel upstairs...

and had to potty really bad!

So I started to climb out her window on the 2nd story...

Because that's where the potty is?

 Rachel saved my life by yelling at me to stop being an idiot.

 But I was still in my psycho Four Loko rage...

So she was a mere inconvenience to me at the time.

So I made my way down the dark hallway into what I thought was the bathroom....

But it was so dark I couldn't tell...

I kept running into chairs and obstacles and I was trapped.

I opened another door and got a face full of hangers.

I must have been in Derek's room...

I thought about what would suck more in the morning...peeing in Derek's closet, or waking him up in the middle of the night to tell him I was trapped in his room.

Uhh...

 And a second later, I heard rustling and Derek turned on his light and looked down upon me with a look of rage that burned like a thousand suns.

 

 And Derek growled something at me about what I was doing there are how he had to get up early...

So I made my way back to Rachel's bed, and we all slept peacefully until the next morning when Rachel was pissed at me for jumping out her window and spooning with her with no pants on.

The End.

PS: I love you, Derek, darling.